MY TWO WONDERFUL DAUGHTERS

Janelle on the left ~ Marcia on the right

First and foremost I wish all my followers and friends a wonderful 2013, and may all your dreams
come true #blessings.  I am so pleased I'm beginning a new year, as 2012 was the most difficult and trying year I have yet experienced. Having been too ill to write on my blog, as it was just too demanding; and at the same time I would not have been able to cope even if I had fiercely wanted to. Pain and tiredness was overwhelming, and the most important factor I had to focus on was my health. That too wasn't easy ~ but I'm still here and trying to do my best. It takes guts.
Crohn's disease is not the most pleasant illness one can be dealt. It's hard work, a lot of medication, frequent hospitalizations, and very little assistance or understanding from those who are close to you, or some folk who simply don't understand....
Frequent dietary changes, sloppy foods, nights and days spent on the toilet...the list goes on...

Joint pain, muscle wasting, steroid use and its drastic side affects, fibromyalgia, bruising, iron infusions, copious amounts of minerals, then surgeries - and all the bowel resections that leave one undernourished. One may say the gut has the inability to cope with a short bowel and nutrition. Yes, my weight has dropped quite substantially. But we march on...

I have managed to come to twitter on a few occasions, however my stays were never of any lengthy duration so to speak, not like in times gone by whereby I was almost addicted. I surely missed it, and really missed all my friend's wonderful quotes and poetry. To you I say ~ I love you #3wordpoem....

Then, early December, when I thought my life was falling into shape just that wee bit better, only to be told that my baby girl had passed away. She was found asleep sitting up on her sofa...her house in order, the christmas cards all ready to be sent. Oh no...I fell to pieces and was in shock for several weeks..up till this day I am still waiting for closure; as the death was sudden and not suspicious, a Coronial Inquiry is still under way. I ask? Why? What? Marcia and I spoke on the phone almost on a daily basis, but for some peculiar reason we hadn't spoken for three days ~ I guess only God knows.

For the purpose of keeping the mind occupied I've now got a new garden with displays. I purchased a brand new lounge suite etc. and bought Coco my staffy a new collar. Perhaps just to spoil ourselves a little.

I guess that's enough for now.....

I'm really hoping to be a regular on twitter as soon as able. A small Haiku I wrote ~ 

Snapped by frozen ice / a deep wound beholds the soul / inseparable love was #haiku

 RIP my pink butterfly

Versatile Blogger Award

I was nominated for the "Versatile Blogger Award" in the category of POET &  WRITER. I am truly humbled by this nomination and thank Art Doris ‏ https://twitter.com/#%21/artedoris for the nomination.
Truly honoured Doris. As a fellow writer and photographer you have truly inspired me during my time
on twitter and find you most inspirational in our 'Timeline'. I duly wish Rich Weatherly a big thank you
for steering me in the right direction. I'm a real novice here, thus needing a pro...


A BIT ABOUT MYSELF:

The areas I most embrace and believe in are not only on a personal level, but also for mankind

I aspire to be the best in my ability to become a non fictional writer, with zest and integrity

Spirituality ~ for myself and those who share it

Honesty and loyalty are virtues I admire 


Solitude is a big one for me, and the maintaining of peace and love is essential

My haiku poetry is getting better as I practice: Please read my haiku on my post: Perhaps a comment

With my health being poor. I need to pluck up the courage to write about it more often,

so as I may help others who are in my situation. Give me a chance.....

                                                         
15 blogs I admire:

1.Shashi  http://shadowdancingwithmind.blogspot.in/  POETRY & HAIKU


2.The Urban Hippie http://theurbanhippie.wordpress.com/  PHOTOGRAPHY

3.Paints With Words

What Would You Say - What would you say if you knew that I loved you Would you invite me always to walk by your side Or…POETRY

4.SpiritualHuman

“Seers & Sages” Compiled by Hasan Askari / David Bowen  SPIRITUALITY

5-One Man's Wonder

6. FIGHTING CHANCE – The Ethical Barbs of Fishing  WRITER

7.Soul Magic  SPIRITUALITY

Namaste: Greetings from the Soul  SPIRITUALITY

-In The Bloom

8. Abandonment - sparse not white hollow no echo vast humming the soundless...POETRY & HAIKU 

-Four Seasons of My Soul

9. Inner peace - * * *Is it me?* *reflecting into your silence-* *is it you?*  WRITER

10.Communicating with Spirits

11.What is a medium? - The concept of mediumship elicits mixed responses....PSYCHIC MEDIUM

12.Masters of Light

- "The Secret of the Universe"-YouTube Video... HIGHER CONSCIENCE COACH

13.Versed for Life: http://xavierleslie.blogspot.com.au/
     POET
14. Lesism - By Les Floyd http://lesism.blogspot.com.au/  WRITER

15. ‏Devin Waugh ~ http://www.capturedmomentshaiku.blogspot.com.au/ HAIKU ~ PHOTOGRAPHY

                                                                     
                                                                  

Poetry

Overcoming Fears

It was not until I came to twitter that I met up with a poetry known as Haiku. At the time I thought what a strange and childish method of writing, and how easy it all looked. It really didn't make sense at all. For a long time I didn't acknowledge the authors; dismissing their efforts and never re-tweeting them.
Then I met Sarshi ~ @VerseEveryDay ~ he commented on my blog and left a lengthy comment on one of my posts which was just delightful. I then commenced taking a closer look at his Haiku, and I could see something there, but still not sure. He posted a whole Article on his blog for my perusal, explaining its heritage, the formatting, and other noted matters of importance. It did give me some insight; it was then I commenced picking things to pieces. It was the picking of pieces that gave me the insight on how simple it was, but not so...to be really good I found was very difficult, and there lies the secret. The secret consumed me...words that tell a whole story. How fascinating!
But I was ever so afraid to try writing the format, and shy for the feed back I may receive. It was not my usual writing as with quotations. Well I gave it a go...I wrote just two..mmmm not all that good, but it was a start. I soon went back to my comfort zone and merrily went along doing what I knew...still consumed!!??
Entered  into several websites relating to Haiku, and basically all were more or less the same ~ I did find a few sites with some simple poetry which I would later use for the stream. None of it was my work, however some of the writers on my stream would re-tweet them; it was a slow start ~ I had begun to lose my fear.
In the last few days I managed to write quite a bit of Haiku, all written by yours truly...am somewhat proud.
I received a DM saying "You're really good"..."Wow really?"

A sheer veil wrapped / around her naked body / dancing flutters under the moon #haiku #freehaiku
An ant nibbling at my toe / displeasure soaked me / the picnic was nice #haiku #freehaiku 
deep in the forest / perusing fallen leaves / waterfall in the distance #haiku 
Sitting on my arm / a tiny ladybird / searching for my love #haiku
array of fine colours / follow a discourse path / the cat pouncing thru' pink #haiku #freehaiku 
A coloured butterfly / sitting on my dog's back / both afraid to move #haiku
flying white curtains / wind whirling them / spiderweb fell apart #haiku
Morning dew on window sill / red parrot perched on the edge / catching the worm #haiku
Remembering your love / powerful with passion / an exit before it flowered #haiku #freehaiku 
A haunting smile / seen thru' the brushes / bewilderment seized time #haiku #free haiku #poetry 
Met you yesteryear / a fleeting thought / reduced me to depression #haiku #poetry 
Just outside the window / coloured bird sits on vine / beak picking the grapes #haiku #poetry 
Perfect bird nest / neatly nestled between eaves / waiting for new arrivals #haiku #micropoetry
There in the shadow / a hovering bird / it's feeding time #haiku #micropoetry
She nibbling at his lips / response was equal / a white dove circled #haiku 
Please say that again / my hands are trembling / I love you #haiku #freehaiku 
Little tiny flowers / embrace the ground beneath me / forgot my picnic basket #haiku #micropoetry
Grovelling footsteps / heard outside dark window / looking for food  #haiku #free haiku
A stranger at my door / selling religion / as I sat in lotus position #haiku #micropoetry
sun and moon / follow each other / both sooth my bedroom window #haiku #poetry 
Dancing in the dark / your hands are warm / my dog barking at you #haiku #micropoetry
In a neon lit lane / the homeless are sleeping / I left some noodles #haiku #micropoetry 
A large sweet sunflower / shone towards me / The yellow blinded me #haiku #micropoetry
Walking in the rain / my soul reflects a sigh / for it's cleansed somehow #haiku #poetry 
A brick paved road / basket on head / family at home / wait for her return #micropoetry 
Cranes in formation / heading to superior ground / a feed is to be found afar #haiku #poetry 
Met you yesteryear / a fleeting thought / reduced me to depression #haiku #poetry 
Perfect bird nest / neatly nestled between eaves / waiting for new arrivals #haiku #micropoetry 
Corner of depression / a figure very lean / walkers by looking on  #haiku #micropoetry 



 



 I hope to write more and become better!



Copyright

TRANSFORMATION Courage

Sometimes even to live is an act of courage ~ Lucius Annaeus Seneca.

 My life in a variety of colours


Often times there are some folk who will keep looking as to whether the grass is "greener" on the other side. And that's ok...
Allow me to elaborate ~
My grass is seldom green, I have no appeal for the neighbours either, nor the manicured ones...
All in all I have a great positive spiritual life, and am happy with my lot...However, no one is free from pain and discomfort, and I also fit into that category...what is category?..Doctors say so...mmm
When one has been ill for as many years as I have seen, we arrive to the word not 'green', but rather 'courageous'...and this is how it goes....
Perhaps I'm not home for anyone.... No, I don't answer the phone.... nor answer the door...
The only comfort to find is lying in bed without a book, without a television,  and preferably in the dark...
Do I like it?...Oh no, not at all...but I'm so overwhelmingly tired...and I haven't even done anything to make it so...
Besides my comforts, my family and friends, including dog ~ I have 3 screens at home - a huge TV, a desktop, and a laptop...my "companions" for life. Well certainly at times when the chips are down...Often on a daily basis...
Is this really it?  Oh no ~ how boring, stifling, repetitive...
All so not me. All so not what I desire. Everything I never had TIME for in the past. No objectives to attain a goal...Only on a daily basis, as with meditation and spiritual aspiration...

The goal is PATIENCE and PEACE,
and be content with that.

 

"TRANSFORMATION" Solitude

I never knew I would enjoy solitude. I always lived in the fast lane. Then I awakened. Moved far away, and gradually moved into another tempo so to speak. I cannot comprehend why we should have to live our lives on a roller coaster of this and that...For me solitude was given to me as a gift, ( as I learned ) and treasured as such. I am no multi - tasker in life and its daily functions; I lose all focus amidst the noise and chaos around me, and it somehow makes me nervous and upset. I love to hear my dog snoring in the distance, and hear the trees outside rustling in the wind. I have been so fortunate to have had a great teacher via my father. My father was a man who worked hard for his family as a Dr., but he lived the life of a very simple human being...he was a philosopher of all. His music made one cry, as he levitated in meditation he would write a whole symphony of musical works for say the 15th century...amazing to remember and then to write it all on paper in note form. I miss him dearly and think of him each day.
I live my life in solitude whilst others make comments about my mere existence...I'm called a loner, a hermit, anti-social and more...I do have compassion for their viewpoints for they know no better...Also a sense of humour which helps tremendously... I am friendly and approachable to others seeking solitude and being happy in that situation...few have the patience nor the feeling of the aloneness they fear so much. There is nothing to fear....
When I was in College, I had to write poetry for my Literature class...my ambiguity was evident /  different....
I am young / yet old / I am happy / yet sad / I am well / yet not / I have / yet not.....something like that....
I'm so pleased to have met some people who do understand.....my conscious is one of honesty and trust...I live thru' my soul for I know my intuition has been a strong one for me...I guess I'm lucky...

                                                                        

TRANSFORMATION blossoming - and see it thru'

TRANSFORMING YOUR SPIRITUALITY

It was some tine ago that my husband came home with his new girlfriend: yes they came to the matrimonial home - He was with a new lady, who just happened to be his drinking partner..They walked hand in hand. Was I dreaming? Here I was with 2 very young wonderful daughters just aged 2 and 6. I was dumbfounded and speechless. I had lost my husband, my home, my stability, provider, and now my dignity, and felt shamed for some reason.I quickly found a new cheap place of residence, so as I was able to move on...but that in fact took many years. Yes, I moved. But I didn't move on...and there lies the answer...I had no idea on how to handle things. I had to meet new people, new friends, and the family matters that had compromised my mere existence. It all had to begin with me! I had to change!...Was it easy? No, I wouldn't say that..It was terribly difficult and enduring, but with patience and help I began to get a 'new' life....
I reached out to my friends, new friends, people that I had not met before. I hadn't heard of LOVE / PEACE / and MOTHER EARTH...It was strange at first, but soon it fell into place.

I was given a book by Kahlil Gibran on loan. I tried to read it, but my comprehension was lacking for some time. I didn't understand it, however I did find it interesting. I really liked the illustrations I do remember. The book turned up here and there whenever I visited friends. Then I was given a book as a gift by Louise Hay. Now that made more sense. I did enjoy reading that, and somehow understood its contents and meaning....That led for more searching...Yes, Deepak Chopra, Florence Shovel Shinn, Dr. Wayne W. Dyer, and on it went...
I loved philosophies...That of Buddhism, Taoism, Hinduism, and more...That's really when I got more serious.
MEDITATION...I attended Raja Yoga for many years, yes I found out what the third eye was. We dressed in white, but the most fascinating thing I noticed was how healthy and rosy cheeked these calm people appeared. The poise, manner, and speech was all so calm and centred. I remember when I enquired about the establishment, I entered wearing a leather jacket...no, not a biker one, but it could have been. I just didn't know at first.
 I attended meditation both early morning and in the evening...sitting and listening to the best information I had yet found. In former years I would have been in a jazz club till early hours of the morning. TRANSFORMATION
I travelled to Hong Kong, China, and Thailand many times...and each time I would learn more and more about the people and Buddhism. I lived in Hong Kong from 1986 - 1992...In the villages you could well see Lao Tse at work. City people practiced mainly Buddhism...I was in my glory...I loved the monks. They would make themselves available for some food or a cigarette...Information...Began spending a lot of time at retreats, these were of immense value for gaining quietness and the smell of the country air was exhilarating. Again I met so many like minded people who when appropriate would share their experiences....
I'm on a higher PATH now, and I absorb a day at a time.